KIT

Remember when you got your yearbook at the end of the year.  All your friends signed things like "Have a great summer" or "KIT" (keep in touch).  And unless you were going to the same school the next year, you didn't really talk to them much after that.  Unfortunately that has followed me into adulthood.  I changed school so many times growing up (8 times from K-12), and until 5th grade, I never went to school with the same people for more than 2 years. 

So long lasting friendships in school were never a priority for me.  I had a good group of friends from church that stayed the same through the years.  And once I got to Father Ryan, I gained a few amazing friends that I've held on to.  As an adult though, I've gone through a slew of friends that changed every so often with circumstances.  Some were fun loving and not so good influences.  And some have really made an impact on me. 

One in particular is my dear friend, Nicole.  She was there for me at a time when I felt completely alone.  When I got married, I never dreamed that my husband would leave 2 weeks later to fight in a budding war.  I was an hour from my family, which isn't all that far, but with them working and gas prices being as high as they were/are it wasn't practical for us to make trips back and forth all the time.  So the day to day became very lonely.  I tried going to a few FRG (family readiness group) meetings on post.  But the women, at least in my group, weren't very welcoming.  So I abandoned that venture. 

Luckily, Nicole lived in the next building over from me.  Her husband was also in the same unit with Loren.  And they were roommates before we all got married so I was able to get to know her a little bit before they deployed.

I said luckily, but that's wrong.  God blessed me with her.  We had this connection right off the bat.  We got along great and never ran out of things to say in conversation.  When the guys got out of the army, we all moved into an apartment together in Antioch.  I made my first Thanksgiving meal with her.  We went through a lot in just a few months.  She ended up moving back to her hometown and divorcing her husband.  Long story.  And through the National Guard, she was deployed to Afghanistan.  After that we kind of lost touch.  I was so sad to have lost her.  Sure, we had Myspace...and when that got old, Facebook.  But I didn't do my part to KIT.  I think sometimes, friendships can become artificial.  You say "Great to see/talk to you" or "Yeah, I'm doing fine.  How are you?", and then you don't listen to the answer.  You don't invest yourself in their lives.

Well, recently Nicole and I have been messaging more and I love it.  She's had a rough go of it in the last 5 years.  She's raising 3 daughters on her own.  She's trying to make it through school and work a full time job.  And she only deserves the best.  Her husband treated her very unfairly.  He was unfaithful to her, and wasn't very secretive about it.  While she was working as the bread winner of the family, he was working security at a club downtown and flirting with every girl in his path.  And sometimes more than flirting. 

I feel somewhat responsible for how their marriage ended.  Because I would tell her of all the things going on while she was away.  After we moved to Nashville, she was still working up in Clarksville and they had their apartment up there still at that point so she'd stay up there if she worked several days in a row.  It's utter humiliation when your spouse chooses to be with someone intimately other than you.  And that's not always a physical thing.  I felt obligated to tell her.  He told me so many times to stay out of it.  Should I have?  She honestly believes it would've ended the same way, regardless of my intersession.  But I still couldn't help but feel that I was the catalyst that caused her to move. 

She has long since eased my mind on that.  And now, I am determined to make our friendship a priority in my life.  I know how much it helps to know someone is thinking of you and praying for you when you hit a rough patch or need encouragement.  And she's always a comfort to me. 

Angel By Your Side
Francesca Battistelli

I can't say that everything's okay
'Cause I can see the tears you're crying
And I can't promise to take the pain away
But you can know I won't stop trying

(Chorus)
I'll be the angel by your side
I will get you through the night
I'll be the strength you can't provide on your own
'Cause when you're down and out of time
And you think you've lost the fight
Let me be the angel
The angel by your side

I know it feels like you're running out of faith
'Cause it's so hard to keep believing
But if I can bring a smile back to your face
If for a moment, you'll forget all about it

(Chorus)
I'll be the angel by your side
I will get you through the night
I'll be the strength you can't provide on your own
'Cause when you're down and out of time
And you think you've lost the fight
Let me be the angel
The angel by your side

'Cause this won't be the last time
You'll need a little hope
But I want to be the first to let you know

(Chorus)
I'll be the angel by your side
I will get you through the night
I'll be the strength you can't provide on your own
'Cause when you're down and out of time
And you think you've lost the fight
Let me be the angel
The angel by your side